Can you keep a secret?
Over the past few months, I've undergone what appears to most to be a healthy transformation. I quit smoking, I've lost weight, I even seem happy. While it is true that I did quit smoking, that isn't why I have lost weight. Happy people don't hide 90% of their life away from everyone. But, my mask is pretty solid. Aside from a few slips of temper, it's believable by everyone. Well, almost everyone. But that isn't the secret. I think anyone reading this knows I wear depression and anxiety like a cloak and shield while I hide behind a mask of lies. No- the secret is actually my weight loss. I meant to quit smoking. I wanted to, so I did. But for some reason the wires in my brain that would scream at me for a cigarette are screaming something new. Control. I dominated my cravings. I had control again. And if I had control over smoking, maybe I could control something else. But I couldn't do it while I was keeping anxiety at bay with medication.